No Wave greats.
'Arty noisy pop from the No Wave underground, with Glenn Branca on guitar and Wharton Tiers on drums, 80% songs and 20% acidic vitriol. A microcosm of NYC rock, from The Modern Lovers to The Velvet Underground' -j simpson
'Yeah, man. This scared the whole shit house in the day. Branca is/was the real real. He impacted everyone he intended to. Gira was his lapdog and Sonic Youth literally worshipped at his altar. His solo guitar performances were the last statement on guitar terrorism. The best always dig the best.' -Owly Timbre
'Acute Records rule. It's about time this stuff saw the light of day. These guys are totally unappreciated... if they had been on ''No New York'' as planned, they'd be held in the same light as DNA and the Contortions. As it is, up until this release, they were best known as the band that got Glenn Branca started.
This record is full of great stuff that runs the gamut from fast paced minimalist punk ("Theoretical Girls"), to electro-pop (the brilliant "US Millie"), to punchy punk rock ("No More Sex"), to abrasive no wave ("Computer Dating") to jagged jazz rock ("Polytonal") and back again.
It's great to have this record after being limited to a single 7" for 20+ years.'
RichieDagger
"Theoretical Girls was a New York band formed by Glenn Branca and Jeff Lohn that existed from 1977 to early 1979. They were among the most enigmatic of the late '70s New York no wave bands, famous not so much for their music, since they released only one single during their brief existence, but because the group launched the careers of two of New York's best known experimental music figures, composer Glenn Branca and producer Wharton Tiers. The latter played drums, the former guitar (as you might expect) in the quartet, which also featured keyboardist Margaret DeWys and vocalist/guitarist Jeffrey Lohn, a classically trained composer who, like Branca and so many others in the no wave scene, wasn't interested in working with popular musical forms until inspired to do so by the explosion of punk rock. The group's sound was comparable to that of the other no wave bands working in Manhattan at the time, i.e. Contortions and DNA. Always confrontational and often funny in an aggressive way, the band's sound consistently displayed the influence of American minimalist composers, ranging from sparse, clattering rhythm pieces that sound like immediate forbear of early '80s Sonic Youth to fascinatingly brutal, abrasive slabs of art-punk noise."
'Over the last few years a great deal of attention has been paid to the NYC No Wave scene of the late 70s. There have been books, movies, and quite a few reissues/issues of classic and essential music. Acute Records is proud to have been involved with some essential reissues from the period, such as our first CD, containing Jeffrey Lohn’s contributions to the Theoretical Girls.
Jeffrey Lohn is an artist, composer, writer, teacher and plumber. During the genesis of the No Wave scene, he hosted late night concerts in his Soho loft, where artists like Tim Wright, Laurie Anderson and Nina Canal would gather and perform music. The No Wave scene was filled with artists, non-musicians, improvisers and composers who were being inspired by the energy and aesthetics, if not the sound, of the cresting CB’s punk scene. The raw and aggressive punk of bands like the Dead Boys were of particular interest to Lohn, who wanted to combine his “serious” compositions with the raw energy of punk rock. Finding likeminded people such as Glenn Branca (gtr, bass, vocals), Margaret Dewyss (organ, bass, vocals), and Wharton Tiers (drums, vocals), he formed the Theoretical Girls.
At the time there, were no bands on the New York City scene that better combined the accessibility of Punk, New Wave and plain old Rock and Roll with such avant-garde takes on classical composition and sheer noise. This combination made the Theoretical Girls both a cutting edge assault of noise-rock and an incredibly catchy rock band. Yet external pressures and internal politics thwarted the official public release of their music during their existence, other then a sole self-release 7″ the classic "US Millie/You Got Me," featuring one song each composed by Lohn and Branca.
Acute’s release of "Theoretical Record" collects over an hour of Jeffrey Lohn’s material. Now, for the first time in decades, his songs and sound will get the credit they are due.' -Bandcamp
Theoretical Girls Review by Andy Beta
'For the past few weeks, I've had a crash course in No Wave: from CDR mixes to press packets, to an interview with the big daddy of it all, James Chance, I've been absolutely deluged in a movement all but kept secret on my own New York streets for over twenty years. The cherry on top is finally being able to hear this archival release of the Theoretical Girls, a band whose moniker treaded close to becoming an apt description of their turbid presence in the history books of the late 70s downtown scene. Hypothetically, what would a band featuring hundred guitar orchestrator Glenn Branca, visual artist Margaret De Wys, Sonic Youth producer/engineer Wharton Tiers, and theatre/dance composer Jeffrey Lohn sound like were they still in their mid-twenties, when the city was still up for grabs and there were many aspects of rock that had yet to be turned by their forefathers the Ramones, Television, Talking Heads, and the others?
Surprisingly, they sound a lot more rock'n roll than their contemporary art credentials would lead you to surmise. And while the Glenn Branca reissue on Atavistic focused only on his singing contributions and the more avant leanings of the Girls, this set of songs descries the styling of Jeffrey Lohn, the more straightforward side of the group. Their theme song starts the disc off at full gallop, taking the thundering count-off numbers of the Ramones and stretching them to the limit, concentrating less on ideas and more on the mad tempo blast, straining to stay within the chords even as Tiers' drums thump relentlessly. "Computer Dating" foresees the advent of Nerve.com, and the faceless frenzy of the New York City hook-up infects every note of the song like a chancrous outbreak.
Perhaps their closest contemporary at the time would be the Step Forward-era Fall, matching their raw rock non-production with the profuse, sneering verbiage of "Europe Max," as well as embodying the lean, gleeful bounce from a few choice rhythmic elements, becoming the latter act's modus all the way through its Brix-era pop sensibilities. The unrefined keyboards of De Wys serve as link not only to the similarly primitive bleeps of pre-Eno Devo, but all the way through the spasmings of another Ohio group, Brainiac, nearly twenty years later. On "Lovin in the Red," her organ's throbs act as contrary motion to the rest of the band, speeding and slowing defiant to the rhythms of the spiky guitar riffs of Branca and Lohn.
The only track ever to see Carter-era light-- as the A-side of their lone single-- "U.S. Millie" runs together inane pop culture references to Howard Johnson hotel chains, Jews for Jesus pamphlets, yogurt health, and Scientology at a Taxi Driver pace, contorting the marquee barrage of Times Square through Lohn's catchy derisions and setting up the 3-card monte stand for Thurston Moore's street hustles circa Sister-era Sonic Youth. Equally powerful is the frustrated garage rage of "No More Sex," grunting and steaming like the nastiest of '77 punk. "Electronic Angie" howls secret constellations of blackened bubblegum on subway platforms, illuminating the preordained patterns of sidewalk cracks and black tar asphalt. Real street gospel.
Some of Lohn's experiments, like "Keyboard Etude" and "Polytonal," are too short and unformed to be effective, especially in light of Branca's buzzing behemoths. "Parlez-vous Francais" works despite their tendencies to shout lyrics in French, but even as redundant tracks appear on the second half of the disc, songs like "Theoretical Girls," "Electronic Angie," and "Chicita Bonita" are high voltage and variegated enough to warrant revising those old No Wave maps, which right now only include DNA, Mars, Teenage Jesus, and the Contortions.'
Theoretical Girls Review by Uncle Dave Lewis
'Some may believe, if they are aware of the late-'70s New York no wave scene at all, that the genre begins and ends with the Brian Eno-produced compilation No New York. But only four bands are found on that album, and in truth there were dozens of New York-based groups that fell into the no wave category represented only by a single or two, a ROIR cassette, or nothing. Theoretical Girls were a major group in New York no wave, but their reputation mainly rests on one small-run 45 containing two songs that was issued on their own Theoretical Records imprint in 1978. The 19 selections heard on this disc, the first release from Acute Records, vastly improves Theoretical Girls' fortunes, albeit more than 20 years late. It constitutes a treasure trove of classic New York no wave that anyone interested in this genre will want.
Theoretical Girls were led by guitarist, keyboardist, and singer Jeffrey Lohn and featured future legendary New York producer Wharton Tiers on drums, Glenn Branca on guitar, and avant-garde composer Margaret De Wys on keyboards and bass. On the Acute disc Lohn is the primary writer and singer on all the material included, although the others pitch in backing vocals from time to time. "U.S. Millie," the track included from the single, is an acknowledged classic of the genre and makes its bow on CD here. There is little detail provided as to the origin of the recordings, and no notes to speak of, but some are obviously live, others are from rehearsals and yet others may be low-budget studio recordings or demos. Certainly these recordings are better preserved, or at least more carefully transferred, than the average no wave artifacts that have surfaced so far on CD. The sound of Theoretical Girls is like a well-oiled machine that nonetheless has several moving parts sticking out of it. As Theoretical Girls' drummer, Wharton Tiers works magic, keeping these difficult arrangements (and divergent stylists) on one page. Margaret De Wys demonstrates that among no wave keyboardists (such as the Contortions' Adele Bertei and DNA's Robin Crutchfield) she had a unique sound, particularly shrill and disjointed, yet amply fitting the bill. Alternate versions are given for some titles, and in the case of "Chicita Bonita" this is particularly helpful, as the alternate has entirely different surface elements, yet the structural underpinning is the same. The two versions of "Chicita Bonita" are only six seconds apart in length, although they sound wholly different. The band's theme, "Theoretical Girls," succeeds in being hypnotic, compelling, noisy, innovative, and catchy all at once with its counting and repetition; indeed, the word "innovation" could be applied to any number of the pieces included here.
Theoretical Girls split up in 1981, and shortly thereafter Glenn Branca went onto prominence as a semi-classical composer of noisy, massed electric guitar symphonies. The others were not quite so lucky in terms of celebrity, and in Lohn's case this lack of recognition has been something of a sore spot. Hopefully, the Acute release will help to improve matters all around. One side of the original single, "You Got Me," was withheld from this all-Theoretical Girls disc, as it was written by Branca; it can be found on his Atavistic compilation Songs '77-'79. Despite that so much time has gone by, and that so many bands have worked towards a similar end since, Theoretical Girls are still fresh, edgy, witty, raw, and fun. None of this music has a date stamped on its forehead, and it remains both timeless and welcome after its long eclipse and obscurity.'
Theoretical Girls Review by Mark Hamilton
'The Theoretical Girls were previously known mainly as a footnote in rock history. A band better remembered for launching Glenn Branca’s career than for a scant musical output of one single in 1978, the Theoretical Girls shared with many other bands in the No Wave scene a tendency to dissolve quickly, leaving as little recorded legacy as is humanly possible from a working band (another good example being Teenage Jesus and the Jerks, whose entire works wouldn’t fill an entire LP). With the release of a new CD comprised of previously unreleased Theoretical Girls recordings, along with that one single, “US Millie”, the band will probably remain a footnote, though a better documented one.
Although Branca is the best known member of the group (having recently raked in mad cash and blown the tops off a nation’s boomboxes with his contribution to the soundtrack of the Richard Gere blockbuster “The Mothman Prophecies”), it’s evident that guitarist Jeffrey Lohn, who helped to spur the current reissue, was its heart (the artwork notes that all music, lyrics and instrumental parts were written by Lohn). Also members were keyboardist Margaret Dewys (who continues to be active in avant-garde art) and on skins Wharton Tiers, who is currently a producer and long-time Sonic Youth associate. The music they created is more “listenable” than that of many of their contemporaries; their music stays closer to the pop/rock underpinnings of original punk and new wave than the work of No Wave artists, who made a conscious effort to start at the point were those genres left off, taking from them their volume and attitude and refining it to produce music requiring an effort from the listener to penetrate an often structureless aural assault. The Theoretical Girls theme song, the aptly titled “Theoretical Girls” (or it’s possibly a joke of a theme song, considering that most of it is just a count-off dragged out to two minutes) recalls the fast chug of the Ramones; “US Millie”, their single, barely even features guitar, and is dominated by martial drums and pulsing keyboards. Some of the songs, such as “No More Sex” and “Mom and Dad” could be taken for products of the artier strand of original New York punk. That said, this still is not radio friendly music; the most recognizably No Wave moment is the room-clearing instrumental “Contrary Motion”, where the band does its best to mimic the sound of an electrical drill being driven into your skull. And “Keyboard Etude”, although lasting only a minute, is in the same spirit, with a strikingly atonal keyboard solo from Lohns.
Despite these ear-bruising moments, the Theoretical Girls are ultimately most memorable for their loopy sense of humor and the playfulness of their music (not that other No Wave bands lacked a sense of humor; sometimes it’s hard to detect it in music that often sounds as if it’s trying to harm you). “US Millie” might be a dig on American sexual mores, but it’s difficult to be sure exactly what Lohns is about when the absurd lyrics veer into pure dada, concluding with a list of items that offers “Jews for Jesus” and “Danon Yogurt” as a counterpoint to “Ms. Magazine” and “Scientology.” “Computer Dating” addresses its subject mainly by recreating a dating questionnaire in musical form. It doesn’t hurt their cause that the band was a gifted musical unit; although the playing is often primitive and amateurish, it’s also uniformly precise and effective. If they had released an album, the Theoretical Girls would probably have been one of the more fondly remembered No Wave bands; this posthumous compilation establishes their reputation, but two decades after it was truly deserved.'
Theoretical Girls – Theoretical Girls
Label: Acute Records – ACT001, Acute Records – act001
Format: CD, Compilation, Remastered
Country: US
Released: 2002
Genre: Rock
Style: No Wave
1. Theoretical Girls (Live) 2:35
Drums – Tiers
Guitar – Branca
Guitar, Vocals – Lohn
Keyboards – Dewys
2. Computer Dating 3:15
Drums – Tiers
Guitar – Branca
Guitar, Vocals – Lohn
Keyboards – Dewys
3. Contrary Motion 3:51
Drums – Tiers
Electric Piano [RMI Elec Keyboard] – Lohn
Guitar – Branca
Organ [Farfisa Organ] – Dewys
4. Europe Man 4:20
Drums – Tiers
Guitar – Branca
Guitar, Vocals – Lohn
Keyboards – Dewys
5. Lovin In The Red 2:16
Drums – Tiers
Electric Piano [RMI Elec Keyboard] – Dewys
Guitar – Branca
Organ [Farfisa Organ], Vocals – Lohn
6. Mom & Dad 3:52
Drums – Tiers
Guitar – Branca
Guitar, Vocals – Lohn
Keyboards – Dewys
7. U.S. Millie 3:04
Bass Guitar – Branca
Drums – Tiers
Electric Piano [RMI Elec Keyboard], Vocals – Lohn
Percussion [Hand Percussion] – Dewys
8. No More Sex 3:26
Drums – Tiers
Guitar – Branca
Guitar, Vocals – Lohn
Keyboards – Dewys
9. Keyboard Etude 1:09
Organ [Farfisa Organ] – Lohn
Percussion – Mikey
10. Nato 2:04
Bass Guitar – Branca
Drums – Tiers
Guitar, Vocals – Lohn
Keyboards – Dewys
11. Electronic Angie (Short Version) 1:24
Bass Guitar [Beaten], Vocals – Lohn
Drums – Tiers
Guitar – Branca
Keyboards – Dewys
12. Chicita Bonita 5:36
Bass – Branca
Drums – Tiers
Guitar, Vocals – Lohn
Keyboards – Dewys
13. Polytonal 3:30
Bass Guitar – Dewys
Drums – Tiers
Electric Piano [RMI Elec Keyboard] – Lohn
Guitar – Branca
14. Parlez-Vous Francais 3:56
Bass Guitar, Vocals – Lohn
Drums – Tiers
Guitar – Branca
Keyboards – Dewys
15. Theoretical Girls (Studio) 2:53
Drums – Tiers
Guitar – Branca
Guitar, Vocals – Lohn
Keyboards – Dewys
16. Chicita Bonita (Second Version) 5:30
Bass Guitar – Branca
Drums – Tiers
Guitar, Vocals – Lohn
Keyboards – Dewys
17. Lovin In The Red (Second Version) 2:36
Drums – Tiers
Electric Piano [RMI Elec Keyboard] – Dewys
Guitar – Branca
Organ [Farfisa Organ], Vocals – Lohn
18. Computer Dating (Second Version) 3:38
Drums – Tiers
Guitar – Branca
Guitar, Vocals – Lohn
Keyboards – Dewys
19. Electronic Angie (Second Version) 2:44
Bass Guitar [Beaten], Vocals – Lohn
Drums – Tiers
Guitar – Branca
Keyboards – Dewys
Notes
Incl. Scans
Music By, Lyrics By, Instruments [Instrumental Parts] – Jeffrey Lohn
Performer – Glenn Branca, Jeffrey Lohn, Margaret Dewys, Wharton Tiers
Producer, Design – Dan Selzer
Remastered By – Joel Hamburger, Sean McFaul
Anthology of (mostly) unreleased material, 1978-1981.